托福独立写作高分范文20111217NA

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: it is impossible to be completely honest with your friend.

下面是可以参考的三个理由用于论证“It is possible to be completely honest with your friend.“

1. You can be completely honest with your friend because a true friend will appreciate you sharing true feelings and honest opinions with them, no matter how unpleasant they may sound. Most people prefer to be told the truth rather than to be cheated. On the other hand, if you do not give honest opinions or truth to your friends but later your friends find out about this, they will be extremely disappointed, which is extremely risky to your friendship.

2. Even if a relationship is somehow damaged because one of the friends is too honest, this relationship can be later repaired as long as a friend is willing to forgive the other. Many friends are willing to show forgiveness, and friendship after understanding and forgiveness is even stronger and more enduring. So you don’t have to keep the truth from your friend to avoid breaking your friendship because you can always expect your friend to eventually understand and forgive you.

3. Many people are unwilling to present their honest opinions to a friend because they think that confronting their friends with the truth may be too harsh or too embarrassing. However, there are always other ways to mildly presenting the truth to your friends, e.g. by writing an email or text message to your friend. This is a good way to maintain honesty while preventing the risk of destroying friendship.
下面是根据这三个理由写出的完整范文：

Complete honesty is difficult under any circumstances. People are often afraid to freely express their opinions and feelings in a relationship, because they don’t want to lose the connection. A good friendship allows you the freedom to be yourself. You can be honest in your friendships, because most people prefer the truth, they forgive easily, and they accept nearly anything if it is presented with kindness.

You may be reluctant to be honest with a friend at times, but remember that people prefer the truth to being betrayed or made into a fool. A true friend will appreciate your honesty, even if it feels unpleasant at the time. By sharing your true feelings and honest opinions, your friend will learn to trust you. She will value having someone she can count on to be honest. The greater risk to the friendship is being dishonest. Once your friend loses trust in you, it may be difficult to earn it back. Dishonesty can have a far more negative effect on friendship than honesty.

If honest opinions and true feelings damage the friendship, you can rely on forgiveness. Most friends are willing to forgive each other when they think they have been wronged. Maybe you learn a lesson about how to be honest in a nicer way. Maybe your friend learns to be less sensitive to other people’s opinions. Either way, forgiveness strengthens the friendship and makes it more durable. Don’t hold back the truth to avoid losing your friend, because a true friend will eventually understand that you have her best interests at heart and forgive you.

Honesty can be delivered to a friend in a non-threatening way that makes him more open to receive it. Many times friends avoid telling the truth because they think it is too harsh. They don’t want to hurt or embarrass a friend. It is possible to deliver an honest message if it is done with compassion and understanding. Offer the truth to a friend in the form of an idea or a question. “Maybe you were….” “Have you ever thought of…?” “What if you…?” This approach gives the friend the opportunity to come to the truth himself without you telling him what to think or what he should do. It is honest, but gentle. Besides, you may be mistaking your opinion for the truth anyway.

It really is possible to be completely honest in a friendship, but you have to be willing to trust that your friend will appreciate your honesty.  You need to learn to deliver an honest opinion in a considerate way, and to believe in your friend’s capacity to forgive you when you get it wrong. 
 
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下面是一篇参考范文，但是请注意，这篇文章有些偏题，写完才发现（汗！）。但一些关于friendship的关键词句的表达方式还是可以借鉴的，请大家看的时候注意一下：

Complete honesty is difficult under many circumstances. People, concerned about how other people perceive them, willingly lie to protect their image. However, in a genuine and enduring friendship, friends allow each other to be honest and true to themselves. This kind of relationship based on complete honesty is possible as long as each friend possesses courage, responsibility, and forgiveness.

If friends are courageous enough, they are willing to share the truth about even the smallest things. Your friend asks your opinion of a terrible poem she wrote. He wants to know if you were invited to a party he wasn’t. She says she hates someone you like and asks if you agree. He wants to know if a particular girl is interested in him when you know she isn’t. She’s mean to her mother in front of you, and it embarrasses you. Being honest when you know it means hurting your friend’s feelings takes courage.

If you are completely honest in your friendship, there will be a lot of opportunities for you to both learn to take responsibility for your own feelings. When you are angry that she couldn’t use her employee discount for your purchase, jealous that she won the award you thought was yours, or sad that she chose a different college than you did, those feelings are your own. She is not responsible for changing the circumstances of life to suit your feelings. Conversely, you are not responsible for her feelings. This doesn’t mean you can’t have compassion for one another, it means that you don’t need to fix the situation.

Forgiveness will undoubtedly play a big part of a completely honest friendship. When you care enough about a person to commit to this level of honesty in the friendship, feelings will get hurt. Mistakes will be made. Forgive him if he talks about you behind your back out of anger. Ask for forgiveness if you lie to him to avoid doing something he wants you to do. You will both get many opportunities to forgive and be forgiven, but with each new situation you will both learn a little more and your friendship will grow a little stronger.

Being an honest person in your friendships will help you develop other characteristics of courage, responsibility, and forgiveness. Let your friendships be safe places to become a better person. Be courageous and don’t sacrifice honesty to friendship; you can have both.