托福独立写作解释句很重要

在托福独立写作中解释句有多重要你知道吗？请看下列托福独立写作题目及学生写的主体论证段：

2011年7月17日北美独立写作题目：

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement？

Because the world is changing so quickly, people now are less happy and less satisfied than people in the past. (2011.7.17 N.A.)

学生习作：主体论证段落1：

The first reason is that the transportation now is highly developed.

Because more and more transports are invented, people can go anywhere they want in a short time by taking a plane or high-speed trains and they can kill the time by reading a newspaper comfortably on the plane or on trains. For example, from China to Washington, I just spent about 10 hours and when I was on the plane, I read my favorite books and listened to the music. What amazing! On the contrary, in the past, people spent at least a month in traveling to a nearby city because they must ride their horses day and night without eating and sleeping to reach the destination. If people went to Washington from China, they should have spent at least 10 months!

看过后，大家有没有发现什么逻辑问题？题目中问的是“我们是否同意由于世界变化快，现在的人们没有以前的人们幸福和满足”，解析题目后我们发现，题目实际上就是看考生能否论证出这个因果关系的对错。而在学生的习作中，我们发现，该名同学的主体论证段落中，根本就没有提及这个逻辑关系，没有提到“世界变化快”，也没有提到“幸福和满足”，所以整个主体论证部分就偏离了主题。这样，即使语法再高级，句式再多样，用词再地道，都是白扯了!那这位学生的问题出在哪里呢？为什么会偏离主题这么远呢？如何做到在短时间内做到逻辑严密，论证充分呢？其实只需要做到一点，所有问题就都迎刃而解。

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我们知道，托福独立写作的主体部分的每个段落中，都需要在第一句话写出本段的主题句，我们叫做“Topic Sentence”。“Topic Sentence”不能写的很长，以20词以内为合理，而且要有概括性，要能概括全段的中心。我们来看看这位学生的Topic Sentence: The first reason is that the transportation now is highly developed.这个Topic Sentence还是比较符合规范地。那为什么后面的内容跟小沈阳的裤子似的，都跑偏了呢？原因就是该名学生没有在Topic
Sentence后加入一个Explanation.仔细分析这名学生的Topic Sentence时，我们会发现，他所提到的transportation与题目中的the world is changing so quickly和 people now are less happy and less satisfied than people in the past没有任何逻辑关系。这时，就需要我们在Topic Sentence的后面加上一句或几句explanation，让transportation与题目中的关键词产生联系，如：With the fast change of our world, more and more transports are invented, such as planes, cars, fast-speed trains and metros. People can go anywhere they want in a short time by taking a plane or high-speed trains and they can kill the time by reading a newspaper comfortably on the plane or on trains .Such convenience brings people more happiness and more satisfaction. 加上这些explanation后，我们发现，Topic Sentence与题目中关键词的逻辑关系就连起来了：世界变化快，带来了交通工具的快速发展，进而方便了人们的生活，使得人们的生活变得幸福和快乐。这样，整个逻辑就通顺了，下面的举例也就顺利成章，论证就成功了。

所以，在写主体论述段落的时候，考生们写完了Topic Sentence后，千万不要忘记在后面加出explanation的句子。在explanation句子中，首先要让Topic Sentence中提出的理由与文章的题目产生逻辑关系，还要将Topic Sentence中的抽象名词如此题目中的transportation展开加以解释：such as planes, cars, fast-speed trains and metros。这样，后面的举例就有了方向，就不会像一匹脱缰的野马一样，把我们带得跑到不知道什么地方去了!

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